Americano - the scourge of coffee drinkers.

Robert Mitchum (top) and Robert Ryan.

There are lots of strange things about being back here; lots of things I am trying to get used to; just like when I first moved to Los Angeles.

For example when I moved there I couldn't find any Battenberg cakes; no cherry Bakewells; no Eccles cakes, fresh cream doughnuts – in fact no fresh cream at all. The fresh cream they give you is in an aerosol-can and you spray it; takes a lot of getting used to but you do.

If you buy fresh dairy cream in a carton there it seems to be made from homogenised milk – in fact you don't get fresh milk as you do in Britain and the cheese you will know about and that's a whole other story in itself; in fact one of the pleasures of being back here is the quality of the cheese.

One of the great things about living in Los Angeles was my favourite coffee hole The Farmers' Market (see previous posts) and the wonderful coffee they served and one of the worse things about being back here is the standard of the coffee; everywhere you go they serve the dreaded and tasteless Americano coffee.

Now who's idea was The Americano? It is tasteless mud! It is the equivalent of keeping a pot of tea simmering for hours and then when you want a cup put a spot of tea into the bottom of a cup then fill it up with boiling water.

When you make a pot of tea you put the tea leaves into the pot, then pour almost boiling water on top of them then leave the tea to brew or mash, for about 5 minutes.

Coffee is made the same way – you make it in a pot and it brews.

Americano is made by adding boiling water to espresso coffee – it's not brewed. And this is not an age thing; we have known espresso coffee all our lives. It was used in the coffee bars in the 50s and 60s in fact I remember the lyrics of the Lionel Bart song Fings Aint What They Used To Be:

'Once our beer was frothy but now it frothy coffee....

well fings aint what they used to be.'

I can just about stand coffee from a cafetiere – apart from all the mud at the bottom of the cup – but what happened to the good old cup of Joe? Coffee from a percolator, a coffee machine or just a plain old filter where you drip the coffee through to the cup.

There was a place I used to use here which gave you an individual filter and you waited whilst it dripped through before drinking it.

In a survey, a few years ago, it was found that coffee is carcinogenic; it went on to say that if it is filtered through paper it has the opposite affect.

Since I've been away all the horrible coffee shops have emerged in the UK; Cafe Nero, Costa, Starbucks and all the other equally guilty places.

There was a Campaign for Real Ale in the early 70s in Britain – remember the phrase Watneys' the Scourge of the Drinking Classes? Watneys introduced keg beer to Britain with Watneys Red Barrel, which was a keg bitter.

Keg bitter is pasteurised to stop fermentation and carbon dioxide is added for sparkle and keg beer didn't need the traditional long pump we see at the bar; but customers suspected that their beer was getting weaker and they were right – so CAMRA came along (The Campaign for Real Ale) and now you can get a decent pint in most places. In the 70s, sales of cask beers began to rise as there was a growing appreciation for the traditional methods of brewing. It is a testament to the success of CAMRA that the "classic" keg bitters of the sixties are now extinct. (source: http://retrowrow.co.uk).

But it's happening with the coffee in the shape of the Americano – be warned my friends. And it's happening with Earl Grey Tea; Twinings have changed their recipe – why????

The photos on here? These are great actors and all enjoyed their cup of Joe!

Lee Marvin: did a naughty thing with coffee.