The Audition Process.

I gave a little talk a couple of weeks ago to my Equity Branch; Equity, as a lot of people know, but not everybody does, is the actors union. It used to be called British Actors' Equity Association – the word union is not mentioned just like SAG (Screen Actors' Guild) and other Equitys or is it Equities? Maybe!!

I didn't take much time to prepare as I was learning lines for my play but, even though it was off the top of my head, I think it went well.

My branch, by the way, is The North West London Branch. The talk was about my time in Los Angeles and the difference between working there and in London – and there is a difference!
First of all when you get there you notice that it is a 'company town' in fact some columns in the Los Angeles Times are called that – Company Town.

There is a lot of help available for professional actors and anybody in the film business and from the Samuel French Bookshop on Sunset Blvd there is everything for the beginner to the old sweat of an actor who has been at it for years – like me.

I had to start all over when I got there; for a start off lots of American actors take classes, have acting coaches and are generally ready for work. They never leave the house without a head shot/résume in their bag and some even have sets of clothes in the car ready for any audition.

The British actors when they arrive might think this is pathetic and in fact a friend of mine said that actual word when we walked into Frenches.

At Samuel Frenches they have books of instructions published monthly on how to audition, what the agents are looking for that month, how casting directors are and what they like, what they don't like or how do they like to be approached.

I remember 2 things from the books and the thing all casting directors seemed to hate was actors coming in to meet them and asking if they could borrow their stapler – you are supposed to arrive with your 8'' x 10'' head shot stapled to the back of your résume and not leave it till the last minute.

Another thing I noticed for one casting director was 'do not touch the CD.' Of course I thought this was something to do with the CD player but no; do not touch the casting director (the CD) in case you pass something on – always wait to see if they want to shake hands with you – now, as my father used to say, what would that give you?

Yes, he would say, a pain in the shite!!

Getting back to the audition process; now when I say this I don't mean all British actors but a lot of British actors are a bit precious when it comes to the audition. A friend of mine went for an audition here in London and there were only 2 other actors up for the job; that would never happen in America. When he got there he noticed written next to one of the other actor's names were the words 'will not read under any circumstances.'

Reading is when you read the script to the director to give him an idea how you would play it – an audition in other words.

Needless to say that actor didn't get the role; I know who he is but I won't mention his name, but the guy who got the part - and it was a Disney film made in Britain - was David Jason; he didn't mind reading.

The basic audition is when you stand up in front of a director and perform a monologue; I don't know anybody who has ever been hired doing this. I did it when I got into drama school and I had to do a Shakespeare piece, a modern piece and recite as poem.

The other times I tried it I failed miserably.

There was a book called For the Actor and one called For the Actress which were full of monologues; I don't know if they're still available.

Sometimes a director will call out 'do you need a chair?' Some actors take it and talk to it.

When you do TV or a film you just meet the director and read.

But in America actors still do that monologue; they don't seem to mind. Some of them have been in series and they still do the monologue and/or read.

The actress Barbara Hershey was brilliant in Hannah and Her Sisters for Woody Allen and ten years later she saw they were casting Portrait of a Lady and the director didn't think she was right for it so she inundated her, Jane Campion, with letters and head shots and was eventually given an audition. Not only did she get the role she was nominated for an Academy Award.

I was on my holidays once in Devon and I made the mistake of calling my agent – no mobiles in those days. She asked me if I could come back to London the following day to meet a director at the BBC and of course I said yes.

When I met him I found the role was tiny and I made the mistake if saying 'You called me all the way back from Devon for this little bit.' Of course I didn't get the part.

Another director told me he didn't take much notice of a reading and I wondered why he had asked me to read.

When I net Ned Sherrin for a job in the theatre he wouldn't let anybody see the script till they got inside his office. When I met him I was supposed to sit back and go through it in my head before reading it to him – didn't get that either. To be honest I got the feeling he had already cast the role and was going through the motions.

I have met directors who have hired me without asking me to read at all and a few times I didn't meet the director till the first day of rehearsals or shooting.

In America you know what you get – unless you are a really big star, an audition.

I went to lots of seminars in Los Angeles to meet casting directors who would say that directors called actors in to read that they knew very well and who they had worked with; they did this because it was for a different type of role and they wanted to see how they would cope with it. I like that idea it's about as far removed from the John Ford typecasting that you can get.

By the way I like nearly all John Ford's films.

In America they like you to be natural, be yourself and behave – not act.

A tip the coaches give is not to keep looking into the eyes of the person you are reading with; this is not natural. People look around when they are talking to others; sometimes you look at people when they are talking but there is nothing so unnatural as staring at someone.

Another thing they like to hear is your natural voice. Some say when an English actor comes in they ask where the character is from and what does he sound like. They will say 'like you.'

I have heard someone say 'put two English actors together and they will be talking about accents in no time.'

The actor in Hollywood, travelling around in their car with a few changes of clothing and a few different head shots, is ready for an audition at a moments notice. When they get the call they will arrange to get the 'sides' from the Internet (it's a union rule that you have to have the sides – the bit of the script you will be reading from – 24 hours before your audition) and then, if they have one, and many do, they will call their coach and have a private lesson with the script.

It's a full time job in Hollywood – it's a company town.

The Audition Process.

I'm just going to ramble on here about auditions; it's the process that every actor knows and a lot of us hate.

Let's face it there can't be many other jobs on earth where you have to audition all the way through your career; there's only one other job where it can be worse and that's a comedian playing to nobody at all just a producer sitting there demanding that you make him laugh.

I saw something similar once when I went to my very first audition – well it wasn't my very first as I had to audition for drama school: one piece of Shakespeare, one modern piece and a poem.

Every actor will recognize those three requirements and I think I explain quite well how I started as an actor in this 90 second clip from a talk show - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VrGBnPB8IN0 - have a look and I'll wait for you.

Getting back to my first audition; I had been at drama school for three months and I saw in The Stage newspaper an advertisement for a pantomime at the De Montfort Hall in Leicester and I decided to give it a go; why not?

By the way I know people on the American continent will hardly know what a pantomime is and will confuse it with 'mime' so have a look at http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pantomime which should fill you in.

I was living in Shropshire at the time so Leicester wasn't that many hours travel away and when you are at that stage of your career you will try anything; so off to Leicester I went and I can't tell you how I got there but it took a long time on many trains.

The De Montfort Hall has a capacity of two thousand and is a venue for the Leicester Philharmonic Choir and the Leicester Symphony Orchestra; acts like the Beatles played there and Buddy Holly when he came to the UK played there too and walking in that day I noticed how big the place was; an indoor stadium no less.

Most of the others there for the auditions were variety acts; I came as an actor even though I was only a drama student; trying to run before I could walk.

There was a really good double act auditioning made up of two brothers in suits who did a song and dance and many young girls with beautiful singing voices; one fella came on stage with a newspaper and started to sing 'Old Man River' then he said to the producers out front 'I also do lines.'

'Do you?' they said 'well let's hear some.'

That was where the newspaper came in; he unfolded it and started to read it out loud in a mock Shakespearian voice – 'The Prime Minister today met the cabinet at number 10 . . '

There was no hook to drag him off stage or loud 'thank you' - they just let him finish and thanked him.

Then came the comedian I mentioned earlier; he was obviously a bit like me – no experience.

He came on the stage and started telling a few jokes and of course because there was no audience – only us waiting to audition – there was nobody laughing and this threw him totally.

The more jokes he told and the more silent responses he heard the more confidence he lost till he was a quivering wreck.

I remember the last thing he did was to take a chair from the back of the stage and say 'For my next trick I am going to do a back flip from this chair and land on my head on the floor' and he stood on the chair; then he looked out front, got down off the chair and said 'no I'm not' and walked off.

It was very embarrassing and I was next; 'tell us your name' somebody said and I told them.

'What do you do?'

'I'm an actor.'

“What do you do – lines?'

'Yes I'm going to do a piece from Present Laughter by Noel Coward.'

So I did my piece, speaking to the chair, and when I walked off everybody gave me a round of applause; I suppose I was different from everybody else there but I didn't hear another word from them.

Now that has always made me laugh when an actor talks to a chair during an audition but maybe that's just my sense of humour.

Most of the other auditions I've been to over the years have been with just actors and there is a difference between auditions in London and those in Los Angeles.

In Los Angeles you really do audition no matter who you are – I don't mean people like Brad Pitt or Jack Nicholson but you would be surprised at the well known faces that audition.

In London actors don't admit they have to audition at all even if they're a nobody – like me; they call them meetings and a lot of the time that's all they are.

You chat with the director for twenty minutes and they assess who you are and base their decision on that.

Lots of times you have to read the lines from one of the scenes; one actor I followed in London had writing next to his name which read 'will not read under any circumstances.' Big headed bastard!!

When you arrive at an audition – on both sides of the Atlantic - you are welcomed with the sight of nervous looking actors who look exactly the same as you; so you can see what type you are as soon as you arrive.

In Los Angeles the actors go dressed for the role; especially for commercials.

I went for the role of Santa Claus once and there in the waiting room when I arrived were three fully dressed Santas and they knew each other.

A bit like the singing Hitlers and the dancing Hitlers from 'The Producers.'

Actors in Los Angeles have their 'sides' with them which are the scenes the casting director wants you to read from the script.

Most actors learn those lines and have worked on it for maybe the last 24 hours.

Actors here are entitled to see the sides 24 hours before any audition – union (SAG) rules.

In London, when I was there, you don't get the sides till you arrive and one time, when I went to meet Ned Sherrin for a play he was directing, they didn't let me see the script till I met Ned Sherrin himself – this kind of process gives you the best sight readers and not necessarily the best actors.

It's a pity about that particular play as Ian Dury was in it and I would have loved to have worked with him.

In Los Angeles they want the best actor for each role and go out of their way to help you which is why you get the sides.

The draw back here is you very rarely meet the director on the first audition and sometimes you don't meet him at all.

The casting director 'reads' you and you will get a call back to meet the director at the second meeting.

If you go for a big movie they just put you on tape so you are at the mercy of the casting director who usually don't know how to direct you properly.

I've been to quite a few seminars, organised by SAG, where there have been agents (they get 10% and no more here unlike in London), managers (15%) and casting directors and you do pick up a lot of hints and tips.

Number one: at an audition when you are reading don't fix your eyes on the other person you are reading with; people don't normally look each other in the eye all the time when they speak to each other. Have a look around, if you don't believe me; so there is no need to do it with the casting director.

Also look at the American TV and movie productions and you will see the actors looking around being natural.

That doesn't mean to say you never look people in the eyes but it's unnerving if you do it all the time.

I also know actors who are quite well known and they don't see why they should go in and meet the director as they have worked with them before or they are friends.

Some directors here still want actors they know to come in for casting as they might want them to do something different from what they normally do; maybe you're well known as playing a killer or a heavy and the director wants to see if you could play something light or comedic.

Or the other way around – you do a lot of comedy and they want to see if you could play that nasty streak or even a bit of violence.

Directors have said, at these seminars, that the actors who don't or won't come in sometimes miss out.

What has been fairly consistent over the years at auditions is the seriousness of the Americans, who mean business, and the nonchalance of some of the English; sometimes the English arrive with the attitude that they have something else more important to do; now what could be more important than your next job?

Of course I haven't been to any auditions in London for over fifteen years as I've been here so things might have changed.

At the last couple of auditions I went to there were some young girls waiting, and I couldn't believe that they spent their whole waiting time sending texts on their smart phones – I refuse to use the word texting – but maybe that's natural too.