Novel 9

Chapter 9

Irene and Sydney

One of the days, when Finbar was sitting in his little sheriff's office, reading his favourite comic, The Eagle, he heard a tapping from outside.

Tap . .tap . .tap . . tap . . getting closer by the second.

Tap . . . tap . . . tap . . tap . . TAP  . . . . TAP even closer, now.

When it was almost outside; he heard lavatory door open: then after a few mini seconds, it closed.

He stood up and made sure his holster was tightly strapped to his thigh, then he opened the door and passed by the lavatory – he knew who was in there - so he hid in the wash room.

Eventually the door opened and out came their next door neighbour, Sydney; a blind man.

'Hold it there hombre -  or I'll let you have it' said Finbar.

Sydney turned around to face him.

'Too late, hombre' cried Finbar, and he pulled the trigger.

Sydney made a move and fell almost to his knees – very very gently; he was a very old man.

He almost reached as far as he could, then lifted his white stick, pointed it at Finbar, and said: 'Take that La Rue – BANG!!'

Finbar fell to the floor with great exaggeration.

'How are you, little fella' said Sydney 'no harmonica today?'

Finbar jumped up, pulled the harmonica from his pocket and started playing 'The Man from Laramie,' a popular song of the time.

'That's it' said Sydney 'I like that.'

It was a miracle that he could hear at all, because as well as only having one fifth of the sight in his right eye, and his left eye with no sight at all, he needed a hearing aid.

He loved young Finbar and listened out, every day for Finbar's harmonica playing.

Finbar knew Sydney listened to The Archers on the radio and played its signature tune and, as soon as he started, Sydney gave him a little clap.

Once in a while, Finbar's parents went out for the evening, so Sydney and his wife, Irene, came around to baby sit. They didn't have a television of their own and they loved watching Finbar's set.

He had to sit next to the TV and watch from a distance of two or three inches, just to the side so as not to block the view from Irene on the sofa.

If there was a singer, or even a round of applause from the audience, Irene and Sydney clapped their hands as if they were at the theatre themselves.

'Did you like that one Syd' but Syd – Sydney – would never hear her. Finbar liked to have them around as they were amusing, especially when Irene went into the little kitchen to see what food was in the pantry.

Sydney's hearing aid was the old fashioned type which had a device with wires.

He was a very good conjurer: one trick, involved a handkerchief and a match: he took a match, wrapped his dirty handkerchief around it, break it, and when he opened the handkerchief again, 'lo and behold' the match was still in one piece.

His handkerchief was dirty because he shone the brass door knocker every time he went in and came out of his front door; even though he could hardly see it.

Another thing he did, was throw a coin into the air, make it disappear, then find it behind Finbar’s ear.

Finbar heard Sydney every morning when he rose, very early, it has to be said, to clean out the fire place; after that he put the ashes in to a special metal bin then went back into the house and lit the fire.

He did this the old fashioned way with loads of newspaper, a few fire lighters, bits of wood and coal.

Sometimes, when the fire was burning in the grate, he threw on a few chopped logs.

When the fire was blazing, Sydney gathered the newspaper and spread it across the table. Next to the newspaper was a freshly poured cup of tea and next to the tea was a metal tea pot which only had room for two cups.

Irene was a late riser so Sydney had the house to himself till she got up at around ten. If Sydney raised the subject of her laying in bed she said, each time 'I rise, mister, at ten-o-clock. I don't rise sooner because 'tis the worst thing in the world for the complexion' - she had heard this in a play at The Birmingham Rep and never forgot it.

However, it had to be at ten-o-clock, if she rose sooner or later, he didn't say anything.

Saturday meant Finbar going to the convent for eleven-o-clock, which meant he had to leave his house around ten thirty or so and one Saturday Sydney made sure to leave his house at least ten minutes before Finbar was due to leave. His newspaper was set aside, his tea cup empty and his dark glasses placed on the end of his nose. Then he went to the cupboard and pulled out a white sheet and put it over his head, taking the dark glasses off and trying to put them onto his head around the sheet.

'What are you doing?' said Irene.

'I'm trying to put these glasses back on.'

She looked around and could see the mess he was in.

'Come here' she said and took the sheet and pressed it close to Sydney's face, then put the dark glasses on the outside so he looked like a ghost wearing glasses.

Irene went to the front window to see Sydney going up the garden, turning right out of the gate to the little alley way behind the bottom of Murdoch's garden.

She kind of knew what Sydney was up to kneeling on the sofa which was in the bay window.

She heard the door close next door and Finbar came out and walked up the lane. When he reached the alley way where Sydney was hiding he jumped out in front of Finbar. Finbar acted scared and fell back as Sydney gave a loud roar. Then they both laughed.

Sydney removed the sheet and put his hand behind Finbar's ear 'what's this' he heard Sydney say and she saw him take a coin and he gave it to Finbar.

'For the plate.' he said.

'There's no plate' said Finbar.

'Sweeties then' said Sydney.

When he came in through the door he said 'Off to the brain washing.'

Irene laughed.

The first time Finbar went to St. John's Convent his mother took him as they were not sure of exactly where the convent to Saint John's Church was. Once found, Carmel went shopping in Gooch Street, which wasn't far away and arranged to pick him up on the way back.

There were seven other children all around the same age, ready to take religious instructions to make their first Holy Communion.

It was a mystery to Carmel as she was a protestant and Patrick had to work on his busiest day of the week when he collected the milk money from his customers. Finbar was nonplussed when he came out as he was ambivalent about the whole religious things. Who are in heaven, to Which art in Heaven, to deliver us from evil, amen to for thine is the kingdom the power and the glory. All those emotive words like 'power' and 'glory' when it was about peace and love – he never pondered on it again but carried on going each Saturday morning till he made his first communion and then his confirmation which was something else.