I remember - Marlene Dietrich

I noticed the other day a CD for sale: Marlene Dietrich with the Burt Bacharach Orchestra, recorded at the Sydney Opera House in 2007. Unbelievable really as she's been dead since 1992.

I remember they recorded together sometime during the early seventies, and she toured Britain with the Burt Bacharach Orchestra and sang songs to promote the album.

Burt Bacharach didn't come over to the UK and I doubt very much, knowing the Musicians' Union at the time, that any of the personnel of the great man's ensemble toured either.

One of the theatres she played was The Alexandra Theatre, Birmingham, where she played for a week, which included two matinée performances in the afternoons, from May 14^th - 19^th 1973.

In those days, my mother worked at the 'Alec' so I was privy to the backstage area and saw the screen legend in the flesh many times; well not exactly 'in the flesh' but you know what I mean!

She would arrive at the theatre, via the stage door, a few hours before her show was due to start and each day a devoted crowd of fans, paparazzi (before they were named that) and a few passers by, would welcome her as she arrived.

When she left, after the show, a huge hue of glittering glamour would fill the tiny street that ran alongside the Alec. The glitter would be the flashes from her jewellery made by the flashlights from the many cameras.

It didn't make any difference how many people were there, Marlene greeted the crowd as if there were a multitude.

I couldn't get a ticket to see any of the evening shows, but was fortunate enough to see a midweek matinée, which was an experience, but which played to a half full house; notwithstanding this, Miss Dietrich played as if to an audience of thousands.

She sang all the well known songs – See What the Boys In the Back Room Will Have and Lili Marlane, of course.

Unbeknown to the outside throng, was a young woman in her forties, who came to the Alec each evening by bus; she would leave Marlene at their hotel to go alone to the theatre in a chauffeur driven limo, so that she, Marlene, could arrive at the theatre alone without any distractions – who's that? Could she be? - and when she went back to the hotel in the evenings my father gave the young woman a lift in his mini.

My mother said it was Marlene's daughter even though she would refer to her mother as Marlene, and I think she spoke with the same kind of German accent as her mother did; if indeed it was her mother.

The request for my dad to give her a lift came from Miss Dietrich's dressing room, so it was from the great screen legend, herself. He was recommended as a 'reliable bloke' who could be trusted with someone so precious but not so precious as to qualify for a ride in the limo.

The rides in the mini took my dad out of his way fairly late each evening and he got to know how devoted the woman was to Marlene. He didn't say much but would listen intently as she would relay how grateful she and Marlene were for this service; I mean he must have saved them all of about £10 - £15 in taxi fare and at the end of the engagement my dad was rewarded with a signed copy of the Marlene Dietrich/Burt Bacharach LP.

I saw the great film star quite a few times coming out of her dressing room; it was on the first floor, right next to the stage, so she had to climb the stairs each evening to get to it. She always looked a million dollars and the short trip from her dressing room door to the stage could have been on a Paris or New York cat walk at the height of fashion week as she swept passed everyone; stage hands, and electricians alike, on full performance and charisma.

I would see her come out of the room sometimes; the mysterious woman would open the door for her and Marlene would 'put her face on' – her movie star performing face; I could see this as the door would open sometimes before she had fully prepared.

She never met my eyes either there or when she was exiting the theatre later on, so I never knew that look she must have given to the scores of lovers of both sexes she was reputed to have known: Gary Cooper, John Wayne, James Stewart - rumours were she had affairs with Frank Sinatra, John Kennedy and Edith Piaf. She was quite open about her bisexuality but not about her age.

Nobody knew how old she was but we now know she was around 73. In the matinée that I attended I remember her singing one of her really famous songs and looking into a part of the theatre where there were empty seats. Of course it's impossible to see passed the lights when you are up there, but she was acting as if she had caught somebody's eye in a particular part of the audience.

She died in Paris in 1992 aged 90; dependent on alcohol and only seeing very few people.

Jimmy Savile: Life After Death!!

Jimmy Savile

Everybody in Britain, Jews, Gentiles, Protestants, Catholics even heathens, agnostics, atheists and sinners, are praying.

Some praying that they got it right others praying that they are wrong. All praying for one thing: that there really is life after death.

Life after death so that Jimmy Savile is getting his just deserts.

Of course before I go on I have to say that the above deserts is spelt correctly (as is spelt) and is not desserts, which is what the Americans call the pudding course:
from 1599, in Warning Faire Women:

"Upon a pillory - that all the world may see, A just desert for such impiety."

For the Americans reading this, or other people abroad, Jimmy Savile was a “TV Personality” here in the UK, who died last year. Since his death it has been discovered that he was a predatory sex offender. Mainly with young girls in vulnerable positions: girls with learning difficulties, girls in children's homes, hospitals and girls that were a bit simple, probably plain and a lot of the incidents took place in his dressing room when he was compare of Top Of the Pops, a pop music show, popular in the 70s, 80s and 90s.
Here is a quote from the Telegraph:
Savile was first investigated by police “for interfering with young girls” when a nightclub manager in Leeds as long ago as 1958. His former bodyguard has told The Sunday Telegraph that Savile claimed to have paid officers to drop the case.
It was the first in a series of at least six investigations that included:
An inquiry into underage sex taking place in the Top of the Pops changing rooms in the late 1960s, according to the show’s then producer. Police interviewed BBC staff but did not pursue a case;
An allegation in 1971 that Savile was involved with a 15-year-old dancer on Top of the Pops, who committed suicide. The girl’s half-brother said Savile was interviewed as a witness, but no further action was taken;
Claims that Savile was abusing patients at Stoke Mandeville Hospital in the late 1970s. John Lindsay, a detective constable at the time, reported the allegations – made by a nurse – to his commanding officer but was told there was not enough evidence to proceed against a celebrity of Savile’s stature;
So here we are a little more than a year after his death and we are all wise after the event.

I saw Jimmy Savile round and about a few times. A nasty looking little man with a moon face who wasn't funny, didn't have any talent, charisma or sex appeal. He looked asexual and I often wondered where he got his money from; driving around in a Rolls Royce and smoking big cigars – he was a deejay for Christ sake. He would boast rather than reveal himself and when he died last year not one of the deejays who worked with him throughout the years recalled ever having a serious conversation with him.

He lived with his mother up to the time of her death and there was talk that he kept his mother's body in the house like Norman Bates did in Psycho; that was a theory, an apocryphal story or an urban myth, as they say in America.
That's the trouble with urban myths and conspiracy theories – they hide the truth.
I saw him at Top Of the Pops when I was working in the next studio at the BBC and when I finished one day I met a friend who was working on the show. He told me to come and see a dress rehearsal and then we could go to the BBC Club for a few drinks; which turned out to be a helluva few drinks.

I watched the rehearsal and stood where the dancing audience were going to stand and the cameras went around me; there were a few girls in there and a few plain looking girls with Savile. I remember thinking what a swell guy he must be to bring those girls – little more than children – for a day trip to Top Of the Pops where they would see Roger Daltrey, Sweet and other pop stars of the day. They were in the studio and the stars had to walk through the crowd to get to where they were to perform; in the rehearsal it wasn't a push.

When we had finished our drinks in the club I went back in to the studio and was told that if the camera came near me, and I was in shot, I had to dance; which I did. More people seemed to spot me on that show than in any of the other TV shows and plays I had been in!!

The place was full of very attractive girls, and the show's dancers, either Pans People or Legs and Co, were the official dancers. I used to see the official girl dancers a lot at the BBC rehearsal rooms in North Acton and was on a nodding acquaintance with one one or two of them. I never saw any of the attractive girls, or the dancers, go anywhere near Savile; his acolytes were the poor things that surrounded him who came from wherever he had inveigled them. The rest of the girls in the studio had to prove they were over 16 to be admitted – so they were above the age of consent – but Jimmy's girls didn't need that.

So now we have Jimmy Savile – Sir Jimmy Savile as he was – on the front of every newspaper in Britain every day and the real news has been forgotten; oh what a godsend for the government.

Savile's coffin.

Barack Obama; yes we can?? Or can he again?

I often wonder why the Americans call their president the leader of the free world; he isn't even leader of America. But isn't it an insult to other countries? I mean - is he the leader of Ireland? Norway or Sweden or even Great Britain?

A little thing I found out years ago, maybe from the movies, is that if ever there was an attack on the USA, a nuclear bomb for example, the president would disappear in to Air Force One, to conduct the war from there, and the Vice President would go to an undisclosed location. When New York was attacked in 2001 that is precisely what happened. But Americans were asking 'where is our president?' 'why isn't he here?'

I knew that was going to happen so why didn't they?

It's the same with this president; he has no more power than his majority in Congress so it's no good blaming Obama because things didn't go to plan with some of the things he promised: closing down Guantanamo Bay, boosting the economy and all the rest.

Now as most regular readers of this blog will know, and there are regulars, I am not an expert on anything. But when has that stopped me? In fact when has it stopped lots of pundits pontificating; including the Pontiff!

Things started out okay for Obama, Senator Edward Kennedy must have thought that his life's work would come to some kind of fruition, with maybe free health care at source and one or two other things and when Ted Kennedy died he probably thought things would go ahead smoothly – just like Jimmy Savile.

Obama had a majority in both houses, he had a filibuster proof majority in the Senate (by one) and things were going to be okay.

But the democrats didn't take seriously the election for Kennedy's Senate seat; the woman that stood for it let a Kennedy type looking fella from the Republican Party – the GOP – steal the seat and Obama's filibuster proof majority. 

From then on it was up hill all the way for Barry Obama.

Every time he tried to get things through Congress he was thwarted by the Republicans, - the nasty party - and now there is a chance that the USA might vote for Mitt Romney - which would be a disaster. This is because the American voter has a short memory – they voted Nixon in remember – and as H L Menkin put it 'No one ever went broke underestimating the intelligence of the American public.' 
 
One of the worries is that Obama didn't do too well in the first Presidential debate but there again Bush didn't do too well in any of his debates with John Kerry or those with Al Gore so all is not lost.

Some people say the reason Clinton beat Bush Sr is because of the economy; the economy stupid was the phrase. But anybody could see that the right wing was split between George Bush Sr and Ross Perot. Clinton won 32 states plus DC to Bush's 18 states. But the popular vote went 43% to Clinton and 56.4% against; in other words the right (Bush and Perot) won the majority between them but cancelled each other out.

In 1996, Clinton did slightly better by getting 49.2% of the popular vote and the right wing (Dole this time and Perot again) got 49.1%. That time though Clinton only won 31 states plus DC and Dole improved on Bush and won 19.

Is this a fair way to elect the 'leader of the free world?' The fella they get rid of as soon as there's trouble by bundling him into an aeroplane at the first sign of trouble? The fella who also gets bundled into a car or frog marched out of a room if anybody goes for him? The fella who says he wants to close down Guantanamo Bay, introduce free health care at source, regulate the banks, put more money into education and a lot of other things.

Wouldn't you say those things if you believed in them and you were being voted in for the job and wouldn't you be very surprised when you got into your Casa Blanca to find you were left holding a tambourine like Pete Best said Ringo was left holding at The Beatles first recording session – can't blame him for being bitter can you about not being as good as Ringo.

So why blame Obama? If Obama does get re-elected it will be no good if he doesn't have a majority in Congress; he will be a lame duck president from day one so what's the point?

Tell me what the difference is between voting for a President or voting for a flag?

WeHo Daily, LA and California.

 Mission San Juan Capistrano

I am asked a lot if I'm I glad to be back in London - well yes, but there are things I miss about Los Angeles – well California – and things I'm glad to see in London. It would be great to live in both places. There would be nothing like it for expanding the mind.

Some of the things I miss about Los Angeles are the things I never quite got to do whilst there. For instance we never went to Mexico although we were very close to it. One day we drove to the border, parked and watched people walking across. We didn't have our passports or green cards with us so didn't chance it. It was at the Tijuana border so we wouldn't have seen much without the car and we  certainly weren't going to take that across.

Places like Hawaii were relatively close but it wasn't really a place I had hankered after.

I saw the great Hitchcock movie recently Vertigo and once again loved every minute of it. Well not every minute of it; I'm not much of a James Stewart fan, although I thought he was more than adequate in this, but I hated his opening scene when he is sitting down holding a walking stick and he is trying to balance the stick on his hand – why couldn't he just sit there like people do in real life?

In the film someone throws them self from the roof of one of the missionary buildings – like the one in the photo above - and it got me thinking about those buildings. I used to live a short drive from one or two of them and a few more were accessible to me if I wanted to see them on a 'day trip.'

But I didn't actually go into any of them.

There are 21 missionary buildings in California up the coast from the north to the south of the state. They were set up by the Spanish in the late 18^th to 19^th centuries when Spain tried to colonize the west coast of America and convert the Indians in to Roman Catholics.

By the way – the few Indians I have met, and they were mostly Navajos, preferred the title of Indian to ‘native American’ which came from the white man – white men professors. Some people – naming no names, Jim – call the people of India, the real India where the word came from, as East Indians!!!! They were only called Indians when America was discovered because the discoverers (Columbus) thought they had reached India.

But I digress again:

Mission Santa Barbara. 

Mission San Juan, Bautista

Used in the movie Vertigo.

Those missionary buildings are still there even though they were officially closed down by the Mexican Government in the 1830s. The Mexican Government? Yes they sold California to the United States just before gold was discovered in 1849, I believe!!

Those buildings are some of the oldest buildings in the state of California and they are the most frequently visited places in the state. I stood outside the one in San Juan Capistrano (Misión San Juan de Capistrano) one day, which is half way between Los Angeles and Mexico, and the most famous of the Missionary Buildings because of the seagulls story, (http://www.sanjuancapistrano.net/swallows)  but didn’t have the time to go in and another time I had business near the one in San Fernando but that time I dropped my wife off there and picked her up when I was ready; so she went in.

The building of those buildings and the colonization by the Spanish are the reason the Mexican and other Latinos of the state are Roman Catholic.

But it isn't just the scenery I miss – as I have mentioned before there are beautiful places in London and expansive scenery in other parts of the British Isles.

I have some wonderful friends in California and there is a certain madness about Los Angeles. I used to see a man every day running backwards. He would look over his shoulder as he jogged along and one day it rained; so he turned around and ran home – backwards!

Some terrible things happen there, of course, but it's the madness I used to like; in rock'n'roll Ralphs I would think nothing of seeing someone with purple hair, a woman with a breast implant which must have been 90 inches all around, in fact I've written on here about the girl who came and asked me if I had ever farted in a supermarket – that was almost two years ago and here it is if you want to read it again http://storytelleronamazon.blogspot.co.uk/2009/10/have-you-ever-farted-in-supermarket.html

Recently there was another bit of lore that will go down with the girl who jumped off the Hollywood Sign, the Black Dahlia, OJ Simpson and River Phoenix. An up and coming star battered his 81 year old landlady to death, climbed up on his roof and fell to his death – that was last week.

When I lived there I followed someone called WeHo Daily on Twitter. Now WeHo is short for West Hollywood so West Hollywood Daily tells you on Twitter what is happening at that precise moment. It can become addictive especially if I was going out. I would look at WeHo Daily and they might say that the street is blocked off somewhere with police activity or something. That could mean anything from a hostage situation to a road accident to a street crime – anything.

So I looked at WeHo Daily for the day when the commotion took place last week and the place hasn't changed. This made me laugh:

26 Sep  Weho Daily ‏@WehoDaily

assault with deadly weapon reported on curson near hollywood blvd. weapon: screwdriver, male white 60's wearing a red beret

26 Sep  Weho Daily ‏@WehoDaily

he's runnin all over the area up there apparently, fuller, back to hollywood blvd, etc -- many many LAPD units descending

26 Sep  Weho Daily ‏@WehoDaily

suspect in custody up on hollywood blvd

26 Sep  Weho Daily ‏@WehoDaily

maybe it was a raspberry beret

  

Then someone replies:

26 Sep  Weho Daily ‏@WehoDaily

RT @DimePieceDiaz: omg west hollywood i belong here 

Then someone else pipes in:

26 Sep  Weho Daily ‏@WehoDaily

RT @IAMtheCOMMODORE: @WehoDaily Homeless man and woman "making love" in the bushes on the corner of Cahuenga & Selma. 5 bike cops on scene. 

Next they take another story, reported earlier when a crane fell over on a constriction site:

26 Sep  Weho Daily ‏@WehoDaily

hopefully nobody is hurt and they are going to try to pull the equipment out of the hole and fire dept and ambulance are there standing by.

Yes nothing to do with the homeless couple – at least I don’t think so!!!!

Now it gets interesting:

26 Sep  Weho Daily ‏@WehoDaily

report of man with NO ARMS who has a handgun in his lap near el pollo loco RT @lallietand: @WehoDaily whats up with the helicopter?

What????

Next tweet:

26 Sep  Weho Daily ‏@WehoDaily

LAPD can't find the armless man with a gun 

I don’t believe this!

Someone re-tweets next:

26 Sep  Weho Daily ‏@WehoDaily

RT @karldotcom: were they "stumped?" RT @WehoDaily: LAPD can't find the armless man with a gun 

And another retweet:

26 Sep  Weho Daily ‏@WehoDaily

RT @linusdotson He just wants to be able to say he’s armed for once. RT @WehoDaily: LAPD can’t find the armless man with a gun 

Back to the main page again:

26 Sep  Weho Daily ‏@WehoDaily

man with a gun may have resurfaced behind parking structure hollywood/highland - "no hands" I think they said this time 

Changing the subject:

26 Sep  Weho Daily ‏@WehoDaily

hearing that there is a tour bus that bottomed out in the center and is stuck near house of blues 

Hearing what?

26 Sep  Weho Daily ‏@WehoDaily

both I think - 1st report said "no arms" 2nd said "no hands" RT @raulroa: @sm1rks @wehodaily one arm or two missing? 

By the way ‘RT’ means re-tweet.

Now a sensible tweet to bring it up to date:

26 Sep  Weho Daily ‏@WehoDaily

suspect is in custody at hollywood and highland -- better keep an eye on him as I assume the handcuffs won't work

I was wondering when that was coming!

https://twitter.com/WehoDaily

 
 

The Casting Director

The casting director; well what can I say? If I say the wrong things and slag the casting directors off one of them may read this one day and take offence. Then what would they do? Stop giving me work? Who knows?

A lot of people who are not in the business, don't know anything about it or just don't care, think the the casting director is the person that casts films and TV – stage and the rest of it – but they don't; or do they?

They should really be called a casting producer just like you have celebrity producers of talent, associate producers, line producers and the like.

Some castings directors are good and some leave a lot to be desired and some, just like in all walks of life, relish what bit of power they have.

In Los Angeles casting directors are trying to get on to the awards list so as well as an Oscar for the actors there will also be one for the casting director.

So what do they do?

Well they charge anything from $40,000 - $60,000 to cast your small budget film in Hollywood; for big budget movies it's a lot more.

For this they will provide a full staff and use of their office – if they have one. If it's a studio film they will use the office at, maybe, Warner Brothers or Paramount. If they are in those studios they will be getting a lot more than $60,000. Some casting directors have permanent offices at the big studios and they still work freelance.

Their staff will be made up of assistant casting directors who will be fully fledged casting directors one day so you need to be nice to them when you meet them; this instruction is drilled in to us so when we go into the offices we are even nice to the typist (you never know) and the janitor!!!!

Sometimes they advertise or put a call out for somebody or something special like a Clark Gable look a like. That happened in Hollywood when we lived there and I remember the line of Clark Gables along Melrose Avenue one day. I wish I'd taken a camera as it was a sight.

 Rather like the one above where they put out a call for black cats.

When I first started I got to know two very famous casting directors – Miriam Brickman and Maude Spector. They both gave me work – Miriam died in the seventies but the great thing about her is that when I called her she knew she didn't know me so she called me in for a chat. She had given people like Alan Bates and Susanah York their first breaks, I believe, and she got me a small role in my first film called The Ragman's Daughter, directed by Harold Becker.

I would call Miriam on a regular basis but I would never call her Miriam – always Miss Brickman. Well I was from the sticks, walking around some of the most beautiful streets in Mayfair – she was in Half Moon Street – like some hick in a city for the first time. I was in Half Moon Street on Saturday and it is still as beautiful with wonderfully shaped buildings and chauffeurs standing in the street; it's another world.

I would also call Maude Spector on a regular basis too and she, or her assistant, Anne, would never moan at the regularity of my calls. One day she brought me in to see a film producer about a movie and a few weeks later I was booked. I noticed that when I went in to the office, which was actually her apartment in Park Lane, she was dressed to kill; as was Anne. They looked lovely and made me feel they had gone to a lot of trouble to meet me.

Maude Spector was the first casting director to mention Sean Connery as James Bond, even though she didn't get the credit, and I believe she was one of the first freelancers.

A little story here – in Los Angeles they have a strange way of casting. The casting director calls you in for the audition, then you get another call if you get a callback and then, if they really like you, they put you on avail – this means you have to keep yourself available for the period of the job; but they can drop you and they do.

Last year I was 'on avail' but they wanted to see me again (it was for a commercial) and when I went in, there were two others 'on avail' too. An assistant casting director said to me 'if you are lucky enough to have the privilege to work with this director, he does some really great national commercials.'

One day Maude Spector introduced me to Tobe Hooper who gave me nearly 3 months work in his movie; when I finished the job I called and thanked her and she said 'Don't be so silly, Chris; we were lucky to get you.'

Struck me as a huge difference between that coke sniffing hysteric and Maude Spector.

So what do they do?

They are supposed to go and see as many actors working as they can; this is done by going to the theatre most nights, covering actors performances on TV and movies and meeting as many as possible.

They will have some kind of office, as above, or they may work from home, and actors will send their head shots and resumés for them to file away.

When the casting director is hired on a movie they will show the files they have chosen to the director, or verbally tell them who they like for the role, and then the casting director will arrange a pre-read, and audition with the director or put it straight onto tape for producers and the director to look at later.

When the successful actors are hired, the casting director will do the deal with the agents, try to arrange schedules, if there are slight conflicts, and then look forward to their next job.

Because of the rarity of the casting directors – mainly one per film – and the plethora of available actors, the casting director is sought after by the actors. It is the actors job to get to know the casting director and sometimes the casting directors doesn't like it if an actor is too persistent. Gone are the days of the old school casting directors like Maude Spector and Miriam Brickman.

What most of the casting directors don't realise is that some of us actors are intimately acquainted and related to some very powerful actors and producers and once in a while we might be asked our opinion. I have recommended a casting director 3 times – that's how I know how much they charge. A director has asked me because they don't know any – why would they?

Some casting directors give seminars and charge actors for the privilege of attending them. The actors go because they might get to meet the casting director and be recommended for a job? Or they might learn a few tricks? Or they might not. There are loads of companies who arrange these seminars in Los Angeles and sometimes you get the assistant to the casting director's assistant; and are we nice to them? You betcha!!

I read on the Internet about a certain casting director who does not recommend 'networking.'

Obviously she has never worked in Hollywood where 'network parties' take place. There's a bar on Sunset Blvd where, once a month, actors who subscribe to a particular casting service go, with their head shots under their arm, and meet casting directors. Does it do any good? I don't know. I went to one once, felt a fool, and walked out!!

This same British casting director, by the way, doesn't recommend sending taped auditions along to the casting director or director.

There is one huge movie star from Ireland who got his sister to hold the video camera and sent his audition off to a film director and he hasn't looked back so in the words of that great screenwriter, William Goldman, Nobody Knows Anything.

If you are an aspiring actor or director take no notice of anybody.

But you know what? I don't mind the casting directors even though these days they are more like gatekeepers who keep the actors and directors separate. I can understand that as directors can't go anywhere without actors bothering them – they even get women throwing themselves at them – so I have heard.

In Los Angeles I once heard someone say 'Gone are the days when you could have an extra for lunch!' I wouldn't bank on that statement.

Ireland.

O Ireland my first and only love
Where Christ and Caesar are hand and glove!
O lovely land where the shamrock grows! (Allow me, ladies, to blow my nose).

It certainly is a hell of a place to write beautiful lyrics and poetry about and sure 'tis no wonder as the place is a mythical mixture of fact, fiction and fantasy.

But Ireland is two places; the north and the south, just as I am three men: the dreamer, the fantasizer and the pragmatist.

The dreamer in me would like to see one Ireland with the north and the south joined together as it used to be, like conjoined twins separated not long after their birth; in my fantasies I see that but the pragmatist in me knows this will never be.

It's true that the Republicans will one day out number the Loyalists and why wouldn't they? The Republicans are mainly Roman Catholic who are not supposed to practice birth control - so go figure!
But how many Republicans, living near the border in the 'so called' Northern Ireland, even though they would die for Ireland, would want to live there? That's a question I heard recently.
The Republic of Ireland, the South, have no National Health Service like the north so how would the Northern Republican fancy paying fifty Euros (€50) per visit to go to the doctor? How much is a Euro (€ )? About 80% of a pound (£) which is about 50% more than the dollar ($).
If they take two children to the doctor they will pay €100 whereas in Britain, which currently rules the 'so called' Northern Ireland, no money changes hands. Health care is not dependent on your job and if you have no job, or you are a child or a senior you still don't have to pay. In fact when tourists go to hospitals here in emergencies I have heard that there is no paraphernalia or logistics to even charge the tourists.
You will never know how much a visit to the doctor costs, how much you have to pay for surgery, blood tests or even hospital stays or outpatient visits living in Britain; and the 'so called' Northern Ireland, as I have mentioned, is ruled by Britain.

They know all these things in America but not in any part of Britain. In some parts of Britain like Wales, and I think Scotland, prescriptions are free too, as they are for the over 60s in the rest of the kingdom.

If there ever would be a vote in Ireland for ridding the place of the partition there would also have to be a vote in the South and how many people in the South would welcome a further million people with a certain percentage of them being on welfare. You couldn't just take their welfare away so they would need to be compensated; so would the tax payer in the south welcome this further burden? The Celtic Tiger is resting so who knows?

I have heard people in America say 'Get Britain out of Ireland' without knowing the facts. A lot of people have died for Ireland and all that has been won didn't come without bloodshed. I think over two thousand people died in the province during the troubles from about 1969 to 1994; these were from both sides with additional deaths in England – or the mainland as some people call it.

Louis Mountbatten

I think The Queen said, when she visited Ireland, that no one hasn't been affected in one way or another; she lost her uncle who was assassinated off the coast of Ireland when he was holidaying there. There was talk at the time (conspiracy theorists) that he was assassinated by the British Government as he was a CND supporter but the people who believe that are the same ones who think Princess Diana was murdered.

By the way she was never Princess Diana; her official title was Her Royal Highness The Princess Charles Philip Arthur George, Princess of Wales and Countess of Chester, Duchess of Cornwall, Duchess of Rothesay, Countess of Carrick, Baroness of Renfrew, Lady of the Isles, Princess of Scotland. Bit of a mouthful aye?
So back to Ireland: certain surveys taken in Ireland say that the majority of the island of Ireland would not welcome a 32 county country so maybe all those people from the hunger strikers to rest of them died in vain.
However before the troubles, in 1969, civil rights were terrible in the 'so called' (you know where I mean) and if you were a Roman Catholic you would find it hard to get a government job or even a job in the police - so some good came from it, I suppose.

A Star Is Born.

Clint Eastwood.

I had a few emails after the last post about the heroes and my criticism of Clint Eastwood making the empty chair speech; and as you may have seen there was a published comment about it being a let down for my pal Jim too.

Jim put his comment straight onto the site but others wrote to me personally too which I would never take it upon myself to publish.

One email said – but he is in his 80s;  that doesn't matter; he is fairly lucid but he was taken advantage of by The Republican Party. 

He has two films going at the moment one of them is A Star is Born; I wonder if he wants me for Norman Maine? No chance; it is rumoured that Tom Cruise is going to play it.

The closest I would ever get to Clint would be by association on the dreaded IMDb; they have a little thing on there which links you with the people you have worked with and here's what it says about me and Clint:

Clint Eastwood worked with...

• Paul D. Johnson on Firefox (1982).
• Paul D. Johnson worked with you on Lifeforce (1985).
• Paul Theren on Space Cowboys (2000).
• Paul Theren worked with you on Timeline (2003).
• Kurt Smith on Gran Torino (2008).
• Kurt Smith worked with you on Kangaroo Jack (2003).
• Basil Somner on Kelly's Heroes (1970).
• Basil Somner worked with you on Lifeforce (1985).
  

Of course I don't know those people as they work in special effects, but it's kind of like the game Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon which was quite popular some years ago.

James Mason and Judy Garland.

the famous 'slap' in A Star is Born (1954)

But Tom Cruise playing that part seems a bit of a stretch to me; I still think of James Mason playing it in the fifties and Frederick March in the thirties.

But there's an interesting story about the version with Barbra Streisand and Kris Kristofferson; they changed the name from Norman Maine, for some reason to John Norman Howard.

The role was originally offered to Elvis Presley who would have been superb. This would be in 1976 a year before he died. He had been disappointed with his film career after such a good start with some really good films in which he was excellent. 

I remember King Creole which was based on the Harold Robbins novel A Stone for Danny Fisher. He played Danny Fisher, of course; in the book he was a boxer and in the movie he was a singer; it had a great cast headed by Walter Matthau, Carolyn Jones, Dean Jagger, Vic Morrow and Dolores Hart who later became a nun; it had to be good it was directed by one of the great directors Michael Curtiz. I loved all those early films.

In the 1976 version of A Star is Born it was Barbra Streisand who wanted Elvis to play the role; he was approached and loved the idea. He even learned the lines thinking he would play it, but when they put the idea to his manager, Colonel Tom Parker, he rejected it. He said the role of a 'has-been rock star who falls in love with a young up-and coming songstress wasn't for his boy' and that it was Streisand's film not Elvis's. So it wasn't to be; Elvis wouldn't go against the Colonel as he was the boss outside the recording studio (where Elvis was the supremo).

It sounds implausible but Elvis couldn't afford to leave the Colonel; his money was tied up and he couldn't buy himself out of the contract.

Elvis and the Colonel.

Was he good for Elvis's career? I don't think so; Elvis earned a lot of money but in the end he had to do a load of crap for it. The Colonel wasn't a colonel at all; he was never in the military.

In Britain we often wondered why Elvis never came to Britain to work – he stopped by when he was in the army – and the reason he didn't come was because Parker was an illegal immigrant named Andreas Cornelius Van Kuijk from the Netherlands; he was scared he wouldn't be let back in to the USA.
He bought Elvis's contract and took 25% of Presley's earnings right up to 1967 and from then on he took 50% - can you believe that; he made more money out of Elvis than Elvis himself and probably gambled it all away. Managers in the USA usually take 15%. 
When Elvis was playing Las Vegas, Parker would be out front selling souvenirs – what a piece of work!
One time when Elvis tried to fire him he sent someone to give him the news and Parker said he would go if Elvis told him face to face. He knew Elvis didn't like confrontation so the so called colonel stayed.
It's a pity as the role in A Star Is Born might have saved Elvis's acting career and life.

Clint Eastwood - my hero??

Neil Armstrong

There he is – the true American hero, Neil Armstrong; just like Davy Crockett. They have to have heroes in America and one of my heroes, over there, has always been Clint Eastwood. One of the greatest American directors of all time. Yes, he's up there with John Ford, Howard Hawks and Stanley Kubrick.

But now what has he done? Made a fool of himself at the Republican National Convention; he decided to support Mitt Romney but instead of making a prepared speech he spoke off the cuff as if he were John F. Kennedy or Winston Churchill and he made a right hames of it; I saw the speech, he was talking to an empty chair under the pretence that he was telling Barack Obama a thing or two and he even used the expression 'Make my day.' It wasn't a clean speech it was mumbled and stuttered with short pauses and when he said the magical three words the whole crowd chanted it.
I didn't expect him to support anybody else, as he has always been a Republican like James Stewart and Gary Cooper, but at least he has worked with left leaning actors such as Sean Penn in Mystic River, which is a true masterpiece earning an Oscar for Penn, and he directed Million Dollar Baby which won an Oscar for Hilary Swank.
So he's no slouch when it comes to directing and he has made at least four classic westerns: High Plains Drifter, Pale Rider, The Outlaw Josey Wales and Unforgiven and he was a far better actor than John Wayne.
But that's what he should have stuck to instead of making, what has become known as the empty chair speech. Sounds more like the empty head speech to me.
Early Friday morning, a tweet from the president's official account responded with a photo showing the Commander in Chief sitting in a presidential chair and the line: "This seat's taken."
Well there we are the Pres got his own back.
But isn't it terrible when someone you really admire lets you down? Why didn't he just keep his mouth shut? And what is a hero in any case?
I suppose it's someone who is brave and risks their life; all my heroes have been brave for doing something that isn't dangerous. In the space race I think Yuri Gagarin was brave – he was the first man into space.
Anyone my age will know that the TV was full of space rockets being fired into space and falling off their perches or even climbing to a few feet then falling back, then one day a man actually got into a rocket and it took off and that man was Gagarin. Okay so they tried monkeys first but it was still a big thing – then Alan Shepherd went up.
By the time Neil Armstrong went up they had it to a tee; he actually had to land the pod with Buzz Aldrin shouting out technical data to him and when they landed it was Buzz who was a few feet behind when they stayed on the moon for that two hours or so but up in the sky was the forgotten man of the Apollo 11 flight, Michael Collins. He kept the Mother Ship ready for the 2 boys on the moon to return as he orbited around it.

Michael Collins of Ireland (Mícheál Ó Coileáin)

Of course Michael Collins wasn't the only hero with that name; the other Michael Collins (Mícheál Ó Coileáin) is a household name in Ireland as he was a revolutionary leader during the civil war; he was the first Minister for Finance in the Republic of Ireland and one of the members of the committee who negotiated The Treaty, which partitioned Ireland and is the cause of the recent Irish Troubles. Even this week there are riots in North Belfast.
When he travelled to London to meet the British politicians, and consequently signing the treaty, he knew he was signing his own death warrant too and was killed while exchanging rifle fire with ambushers on August 22^nd 1922, eight months after signing the Anglo Irish Treaty.
And among my other heroes is Roger Bannister.
But getting back to Neil Armstrong, who recently died, and the other space pioneers. When space travel was on the television nearly every day of the week, week after week and being fronted by men with tiny replicas of the space ships and pods, a lot of us became bored by the same pontifications of these pundits with their same boring technical descriptions of what was going on . It wasn't until some time later, when we saw the beautiful photographs in the Sunday Magazines, that we realised how spectacular the views were that Neil Armstrong and the other astronauts and cosmonauts were experiencing.
I think it was Carl Sagan who said they should have sent a poet into space and maybe then we could have appreciated its beauty at the time. Maybe they should have sent an actor too as Armstrong is supposed to have fluffed his line on landing; he says he said – That's one small step for a man, one giant leap for mankind. And of course we only heard – That's one small step for man...
Armstrong said he was misquoted and we missed the indefinite article. So maybe an actor would have made sure we heard the a – but then he would have been telling stories about his time at Birmingham Rep or summer stock, so just as well - and look what the other actor did; he spoke to an empty chair.

Lyons Tea Shops.

The front of a J. Lyons Corner Shop.

When I was courting my wife – that word courting has gone out now, I suppose, but the word, the same as many other words which have disappeared from the vernacular, is the only one to describe the activity which we were up to; dating?

I remember seeing the movie Elizabeth; Cate Blanchard played Elizabeth I in a very dark looking piece, and I saw it in Los Angeles. On the way out of the cinema I heard someone trying to explain who everyone was in the movie and I heard 'So Elizabeth was dating . . . .. ' Dating? An historical character dating?
Anyway back to the opening sentence – when I was courting my wife we would meet up, on some of our dates, and go to Lyons Restaurant in Birmingham. It might have been called Lyons Tea Rooms or Lyons Tea Shop (always in the plural); we would meet there and order hot blackcurrant drinks. These were served in a glass which had a metal holder with a handle so you could pick it up. Maybe in the modern idiom it would be called a sleeve; they have paper ones at Starbucks – what is the world coming to; or The Planet as they say these days. The Planet!!! I ask you!
Can you imagine a modern Shakespeare? All the Planet's a Stage and all . . etc.
But back to Lyons Tea Shops (which we shall call them); these were in most big cities; there were a number of them in London in places like Piccadilly, Shaftesbury Avenue and, the one I used later in life, The Strand.
The Lyons Tea Shop we used in Birmingham was in either Corporation Street or New Street – I can't remember which – and we would stay in there for some time; maybe even ordering more hot blackcurrant drinks as we gazed into each others eyes.
I remember meeting a friend in the 70s at the Lyons Tea Shop in The Strand and for some reason I don't remember it disappearing – together with the rest of them they faded away; like old soldiers and actors.
Lots of Lyons Tea Shops started to close in the 60s so I was fortunate to have witnessed the one in The Strand at such a late time. They have all disappeared now.

The image that floods into my mind, is piping hot chromium water holders and steam. For our blackcurrant drinks we would watch as the woman behind the counter put about one third of blackcurrant cordial into the glass and then fill it with boiling water. I think I figured out that the metal sleeve would prevent the glass cracking because of the heat although I have noticed in pubs these days hot drinks are poured directly into drinking glasses.

It's a pity that such places don't exist any more; they were more comfortable than Starbucks or the dreaded Kosta – no I'm not going to go on about Americano again (but at least you can get proper filter coffee in Starbucks) – and they were so well designed.

Above the entrance to a J. Lyons Restaurant.

 The shops had a distinctive art deco style and the waitresses, I hear, were called Nippies; a Nippy was a waitress who would nip in and out of the tables to serve customers. By the time I frequented Lyons Tea Shops the Nippies were a thing of the past and the Lyons Tea Shops were converted into a cafeteria style.
They had an artistic director who would design the shops and the name Lyons Tea Shops came from the first man to run the company, Joseph Nathanial Lyons, who was appointed by the tobacco company, who owned it, Salmon and Gluckstein.

Nippy Uniform.                                                                                                                                                             

The Nippies wore these kind of uniforms (above) and when I went to America first I was amazed at the waitresses in the diners who wore similar attire. Of course they don't call them waitresses any more – they're called 'servers' just as the postman or mailman, post woman or mail woman are called carriers!! Makes life so simple doesn't it to invent bland asexual words!! Heaven forbid if we should identify people by their sex!
All the Planet's a Stage and all the carriers and servers merely players!
A few years ago I remember reading that Lyons Tea Shops style was making a come back under a different banner Cadbury Cocoa House; their aim was to bring back the elegance of Lyons Tea Houses.

The concept, and I quote “ will challenge the dominance of the bland US coffee shop culture with its foreign mix of paninis and ciabatta, capuccinos and lattes”

The team behind it was headed by a former operations chief at Starbucks UK and I will quote again “The restaurants, which are more upmarket than existing coffee shops, will offer a 'Ritz-style' tea for two served on a tiered silver stand.
It includes a collection of finger sandwiches, such as cucumber, cream cheese and garden mint, and oak smoked salmon and lemon butter.
These come with freshly baked scones, served with Devon cream and raspberry preserve, together with a collection of pastries and Twinings tea.”
Preserve??? Don't they mean jam?
Back to the quotes -

“The price for this teatime feast comes in at £12.50 each for two or £14.50 for one.”

In dollars that would be around $18 to $20. Can we see that working? Let's see: they promised 50 locations but I can only see one in Bluewater near Dartford in Kent.

I used to take my wife to The Farmers' Market most days in Los Angeles for coffee and doughnuts and it cost about $3.50 – but I'm not counting my wife's Starbucks cappuccino.

Lyons Waitresses.